Who am I?

Some days, I don’t know who I am. Ever feel that way?

When I created this blog, I sent an email to a selective group of friends to let them know about the dream God had placed in me. Mary, my best friend from high school, replied assuming I had sent the email to everyone in my address book. She included her maiden name and wrote as if I may not remember her. This friend didn’t know who she is.

Let me tell you how her friendship changed my life forever.

We officially met at band camp my sophomore year of high school. We became best friends almost instantly. Based on what she knew of me, that was a miracle.

Her family was a second family to me. Her mom and dad trusted me. Sometimes I wonder if they really did or if they just said that hoping that would make me behave. It worked. There is nothing greater than being loved and trusted.

I started attending church with Mary. Because of that, I was able to travel with the youth choir one summer. I love to travel. I also was introduced to the couple that would play a major role in my spiritual survival a few years down the road. I met my husband at her church. He is another gift from God. The influence of this church led me to choose a Christian college. The college friends have also been significant in my spiritual growth.

Mary and I went through a rough period my freshman year of college. It hurt me very much. My pride failed to let me see that she was reacting out of the pain from all the stuff going on in her life. She apologized for her part and I verbally accepted her apology but inside I was not forgiving. She appropriately and loving pointed out my lack of true forgiveness about four years later.

I was so obsessed with her offense against me that I didn’t give her a chance to tell me all that was happening in her life. It was many years before I apologized for not being a supportive friend to her during that period.

When I get an email from her, I get excited. I’m very thankful that we do still have some contact. Her friendship continues to be a gift from God. I wish we could be more involved in each other’s lives.

Not remember her? Ha! God has made me who I am today because of the influence of her friendship twenty years ago.

Lessons from this friendship: Be thankful for every friendship. Don’t be selfish in friendship. When a friend hurts your feelings, there’s a good chance that something else is going on in her life. Listen. Always listen.

Mary gave me permission to blog about her with the hope that it may encourage others. I’ll never forget who she is because “a lifetime’s not too long to live as friends.” (Friends – Michael W. Smith)

What friend do you have that doesn’t know who she/he is? Maybe you need to apologize for who you were and thank them for influencing who you are now.

“Wounds from a friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.” Proverbs 27:6 (New Living Translation)